McSweeney’s List (8 November, 2023)
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So many of the most profound words of wisdom are frustratingly simple. Phrases like be yourself make us roll our eyes despite being solid advice for a variety of reasons, not the least of which is the lack of how. And it's also fair that we have an instinctive distrust of truths condensed to the point of bullshit. (Please miss me with your Live Laugh Love.) If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is, is an equally ubiquitous statement, but we hold that one dear because cynicism makes us feel smart.
Right now I'm working on detaching from outcome. It's another one of those simple sounding things, and as is so often the case, its origins are more complex. Detachment figures large in Buddhism, Hinduism, and Jainism. In the grandest scheme teachings along those lines are designed to lead to detachment to material life, suffering, our own mortal bodies. I'm not suggesting any of that is for everyone, but there are aspects that would certainly do us all some good. So, detaching from outcomes is where my mind has been.
Yes, it's a lot like just do your best, but that one always feels unfinished to me. Yes, there's an overlap here with let go, let God, but a whole load of folks stop listening as soon as you drop the G-word, and all that letting go can feel passive if you're not in the mood. It really struck me when a friend asked how I could be so adamantly casual while hoping for the best ever Candy Land outcome. Well, my Narrow Minded Friend, it's because there's only so much I can do to actually affect any given outcome.
Submitted for your approval (well, not actually, I'm feeling fairly validated at the moment), consider that you've submitted a resume to some company. No matter how much you've polished it, how much ChatGPT changed it, no matter what your diplomas or extracurriculars, you might not get the job. You know that before you submit, and yet you must try, and you must try like you really care. And if you do naturally and genuinely care, you must still prepare yourself for the fact that all the caring in the world will not guarantee the outcome you desire.
Detaching is absolutely harder than it sounds. Rejection goes down easier with bitter grapes. When we don't get that imaginary job, promotion, partner, grant, whatever it is, our defense is to say we never wanted it anyway. It's natural then that when we feel vulnerable, uncertain, emotionally invested and powerless against the result. It's easier to shrug…to feign apathy. It feels safer to say it doesn't matter than to admit that we have hopes outside the spectrum of our control. And, I think that small lie does us all a disservice. It seems to me that too many lives lack passion, lack longing, lack the joys of wonder and hope. It's as though we've deemed excitement to be passé. Something completely uncool that might've once served a purpose, but remains only as a sign of someone too naïve to have yet been disappointed, or too reckless to lie about their true heart. But for the payoff, emotional, mental, professional, all the things, we must show up with our whole hearts, acting as though our intentions and efforts can truly do be what we hope. We must do that while finding peace in the knowledge that we can barely control our own minds let alone the things outside of ourselves.
This is a practice, not a switch, and it's one I continue to work on. Openly caring while admitting my own helplessness is just the kind of shit that makes me want to push a cyclist off a sidewalk. And yet, caring brings me joy. The number of times a week I genuinely say "ohmigod I'm so excited!" are worth the vulnerability. And while I might always be disappointed when I don't get that proverbial job, I will continue to remind myself that my actions are my only mission, and the results are up to the stars.
TIME FLIES
A whole decade plus one year later, and Bar de Courcelle is still going strong! That's 4015 days, 31 000 bottles of whiskey, and countless #BADDECISIONS.
Everyone's favourite chic dive bar on the corner is celebrating 11 years of music, whiskey and friendship, so come join the party!
Famed Folk/Bluegrass darlings REDFOX will be playing their award-winning original music at 8 PM. After that, the lights go down and the disco ball starts spinning, with DJ Mosquito Valentino playing his favourite vinyl all night long! "Come share the love and the shots with us: we can’t wait to get smashed with you." I couldn't have said that better myself.
WHAT: Party d'Anniversaire // 11 ans de #BADDECISIONS
WHERE: Bar de Courcelle, 4677 Notre Dame St. W., Montreal, H4C 1S7
WHEN: Friday, November 10,
METRO: Place St. Henri (Orange)
DETAILS: Facebook
IT ONLY HAPPENS ONCE
The cool thing about improv is that you can't see the same show twice! You know Priddy Playful Productions from Fringe, Ladyfest, and from a wild repertoire of shows that have covered Bridgerton to Harry Potter -- all improved. This time, they have Vampires!
"Discover the nocturnal chaos that ensues when vampire roommates attempt to navigate the treacherous waters of their mundane existence and modern life. Using an audience suggestion, Vampire Stories will tell a thrilling tale in which every bite and twist will unfold in the heat of the moment, fangs and all."
Vampire Roommates has just become my new fave reality show. I would watch it all day. But, this is improvised, so you can only see it once. Don't miss it.
WHAT: Vampire Stories
WHERE: Montreal Improv, 3716 Notre Dame St. West, Montreal, H4C 1P7
WHEN: Sunday, November 12, 730 PM
METRO: Place St. Henri (Orange)
TICKETS: Eventbrite
I LEARNED A NEW WORD
Polyphony as a word means the layering of melodies or voices. As a title, Polyphony is the forthcoming anthology created by The Encore Poetry Project and their contributors.
Poems by Montrealers for Montrealers, this collection follows in the footsteps of Encore Books & Records poetic past. An independent project fueled by love and fresh vision. I spoke with Project Director Inuya Schultz about how it came to be, where it hopes to go, and what a great city we live in.
WHAT: The Encore Poetry Launch: POLYPHONY
WHERE: Cardinal Cocktails et Vins, 5326 St. Laurent Blvd., Montreal, H2T 1S1
WHEN: Thursday, November 9, Doors @ 7 PM, Reading @ 830 PM
METRO: Laurier (Orange)
TICKETS: Eventbrite
…AND A PARTRIDGE IN A PEAR TREE
The Halloween candy was still on the shelf when my local store busted out the Christmas things. I wasn't sure if I should be in costume or singing carols, but I knew that it was dark in the afternoon, so same same. With that in mind, it's market season! Kick it off with the DDO Fine Arts & Crafts Market! Whether you're shopping early or spoiling yourself, you'll find what you're looking for and what you didn't know you wanted. This market has been a seasonal tradition for over 30 years, and keeps getting better. The Craft Café will tickle your tastebuds, and The Artists' Association of Dollard will have works on display and available for purchase. As always, dedicated artists and artisans will be offering their wares, and an opportunity to shake hands with the folks who made them. Don't miss it!
WHAT: DDO Fine Arts and Crafts Market
WHERE: Dollard Civic Centre, 12001 de Salaberry Blvd., Entrance #5A, Dollard-des-Ormeaux, H9B 2A7
WHEN: Saturday, November 11 & Sunday, November 12, 10 AM - 4 PM
METRO: Nope.
DETAILS: Facebook
TRY SOMETHING NEW
Have you always wanted to try a new art form but couldn't find the time or motivation? Sometimes we just need a little nudge to get going, here it is! WolfLab MTL is hosting their very first open lab for anyone who wants to get their hands on a medium or technique for the first time. BYOMaterials, or coordinate with other attendees to bring an idea to life.
WHAT: "Something I've been meaning to try…" Open Lab
WHERE: WolfLab MTL, 4035 Rue St. Ambroise St. #206, Montreal, H4C 2E1
WHEN: Saturday, November 11, 1 PM - 4 PM
METRO: Place St. Henri (Orange)
DETAILS: Facebook
AN EVENING OF MUSIC AND POETRY
José Lobo is celebrating the release of his new album In All Good Hope with a night of songs and poetry. Hosted at one of his favourite bookstores, per the artist: "I always imagined these songs in cozy rooms and it is a dream to present these songs for the first time after the album released in this way…I will be playing this collection of songs from the album as well as newer songs and likely trying out some bad puns."
Willow Loveday Little will be starting us off with her poems that so carefully cross the line between the mythological and the contemporary ailments that haunt and allure us nowadays.
Oscar Coyoli, an alchemist of song and gardener of words will share with us his songs entrenched in “the solitude of the in-between”.
This will be a PWYC/NOTAFLOF Event
WHAT: Album Release Show In All Good Hope, José Lobo
WHERE: De Stiil Books, 351 Duluth Ave E, Montreal, H2W 1J3
WHEN: Friday, November 10, 7 PM
METRO: Sherbrooke (Orange)
DETAILS: Facebook
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